Valentine's Day Ducks of Doom
by Twizzle-fizz
Summary: It's Valentine's day and Mordecai is all ready to try and make a move on Magaret. Rigby on the other hand is only interested in buying some cereal to get a Guitar dude action figure. When then two ride a love duck boat ride with Margaret and Eileen however chaos ensures! Will Mordecai and Margaret make it out alive? And dear God what has happened to Rigby? Only one way to find out


"Ok dude, today's the day" Mordicai stood up with a serious expression on his face.

"The day for what?" Rigby said in a bored tone while digging through a cereal box.

"Today's the day I finally get with Margaret!"

"Eh, you say that every day" he shrugged tipping the contents of the cereal box onto the floor.

"Dude, what are you doing? Benson's going to freak if he sees another mountain of cereal on the floor. You don't even like that cereal"

"I'm trying to see if we got a guitar dude action figure gosh! There's one in every twenty packets and this is the twenty-fourth one I've opened so I'm long overdue to win something!"

"Dude, I don't think it works that way"

"Gah!" Rigby groaned after his search through the cereal came up empty, "That was my last box too. We need to go to the shops to buy more"

"But that stuff's like five dollars-"

"Now." Rigby demanded from behind his nose.

"Sigh, no can do man. Today's Valentine's Day and I am going to make my move on Margaret."

"Pft sure. We can still get cereal first!"

"And risk Margaret getting picked up by some other dude? Not a chance. We're going to the coffee shop now"

"Gah! Dah! Uuuuuh!" Rigby complained but still followed Mordecai out the door to where Benson was waiting impatiently.

"There you are! You slackers where supposed to be cleaning the fountain an hour ago!" The gumball man growled.

"What? But we did that like five weeks ago!" Rigby complained.

"No, you BROKE the fountain five weeks ago. Now we have a new one and it needs to be cleaned!"

"Muscle man's girlfriend broke it actually" Rigby corrected.

"Wait. If it's new then wouldn't it already be clean?" Mordecai asked.

"Hm, hm!" Rigby nodded, "Yeah, wouldn't it Benson?"

"No! Because...it gets dirty...quickly" Benson said although not in his usual grumpy tone.

"Sounds like you're just trying to keep us busy at the other end of the park" Mordecai grinned, "Got something special planned for today?"

"What? What are you talking about! I don't SLACK OFF like you! UNLIKE YOU I have responsibility and don't constantly look for EXCUSES to get out of work!"

"Ah, so you're looking for an excuse to get out of work? Don't worry we won't tell if you've got some big date planned for today or something"

"WHAT? All I want you to do is CLEAN THE FOUNTAIN!"

"The brand new fountain?" Mordecai said smugly.

"The already, cleeeeean fountain?" Rigby grinned.

"JUST CLEAN IT OR YOU'RE FIRED!" Benson yelled then stormed off.

"Hm, cleaning an already clean fountain? Sounds like a day off to me" Mordecai said.

"Oh yeeeeeeah!" Rigby cheered, "Now let's go get some cereal!"

"No dude. We're going to the coffee shop"

"Daaaaaah! Uhhhhh! Gah!" Rigby complained as he followed Mordecai to the golf cart.

* * *

The two walked through the doors to the coffee shop only to find it unusually busy and covered with red hearts and streamers. There where roses in the middle of each table which numerous love struck couples where sitting around looking at each other moony-eyed.

"Wow, everyone looks like you today" Rigby noted when Mordecai elbowed him in the gut, "hmph!"

"Come on let's find a table"

"Look at this place man it's packed, not to mention we'd be the only two dudes sitting together. Let's just go and, I dunno, get some cereal?"

"Look! I think there's a table free over there!"

"Gah!" Rigby sighed again in irritation and stormed over to the table, "why is this place so packed out anyway? It's not exactly the most romantic place to have coffee"

"And you would know about romance...how?" Mordecai joked, "It's what people do on Valentine's Day, they go out for coffee in an over-decorated building"

"Eugh. I hate Valentine's day. It's just an excuse not to get cereal!"

"You only started this cereal obsession like, two days ago. I'm sure we could go to a toy shop or something and buy an action figure if you're that desperate"

"Mordecai you can't BUY these action figures! And what part of FREE do you not understand? Why would I BUY one?"

"Well you've already spent over 100 dollars on cereal and probably even more on carpet cleaning"

"Yeah, but that was your money"

"WHAT?"

"Relax, I'll pay you back...eventually"

"Argh, I need that money to buy flowers for Margaret"

"Well, I don't see any flowers"

"What-...oh no...I forgot the flowers man!"

"Oh hey Mordecai, hey Rigby" Margaret walked over to their table at just that moment, "Sorry I didn't get to you sooner I've just been so run off my feet this morning. So, what can I get you?"

"Uh...uh..." Mordecai started to sweat nervously.

Rigby saw his chance to save the day and so jumped into the conversation, "The real question is, what can we get YOU. Why Mordecai here just bought you this bea-utiful rose!" he said grabbing the one out of the vase on the table and handing it to her, "Didn't you Mordecai?"

"Uh..."

Margaret stared at the rose for a second before taking it and cracking up laughing, "Ha ha, oh Mordecai thank you! It looks just like the ones we bought in bulk today, where ever did you find it?" she giggled and walked off.

"Uuuuuh!" Mordecai groaned in embarrassment, "You gave her the rose off the table man?"

"Hm, hm! Yeah I just saved your butt man. Now you can repay me by going to buy some cereal"

"Ugh! Enough with the cereal already!"

"Oh! I forgot to take your order!" Margaret quickly rushed back, "sorry, Mordecai just threw me off with his amazing charms" she said before her and Rigby began laughing at his expense.

"Ha ha, very funny guys. We've changed our minds, we'll skip coffee today, wouldn't want to put you under any more pressure" he grumbled getting up.

"SKIP COFFEE?" Rigby gasped.

"Oh no-no! It's fine really!" she insisted.

"No. We'll just be going now" he grumbled.

"Oh...ok...but my shift is going to finish in an hour. I was wondering if you two would like to come with me and Eileen to check out all the lame Valentine's Day stalls set up in town."

"Pft, yeah, love to but we have this cera-"

"Sure!" Mordecai grinned.

* * *

"Gah! Laaaaaaame" Rigby groaned for what seemed like the millionth time as the four walked though the red and pink heart-filled Valentine's Day stalls. They were mostly selling stuff like cards, chocolates and flowers but there were also some Valentine's related games.

Margaret giggled at Rigby's remark, "I know. They really went all out this year"

"I don't know, some of this stuff is pretty cool, check out that stuffed bear" Mordecai said pointing to a large bear wearing a pink cape and love heart helmet but had an overall creepy resemblance to death bear.

Rigby cringed in fear, "uh, let's keep moving!"

"I agree with Mordecai, some of this stuff is pretty cute. Like that heart necklace over there! Oh I wish I had something like that. I think it would look good on me too, don't you think so Rigby?" Eileen said batting her eyelids.

"No" Rigby said back bluntly.

"Gasp! Oh my gosh, look at that boat ride!" Margaret laughed pointing at some ducky boats covered in paper hearts someone had set up in the river.

"Ha ha. Lame" Mordecai laughed with her, "Maybe uh...we should ride them...just for fun?"

"Ok sure!"

"Sounds good to me!" Eileen grinned at Rigby.

"No. WAY! I'm not riding the love duck boats!" Rigby argued.

"Let's take a vote, all in favour?" Mordecai asked and three hands went up, "Then it's settled"

"No! I'm still not riding in one! There's nothing you can say or do to make me!"

Two minutes later...

"Ugh! No one told me these where paddle boats!" Rigby snapped squished in one of the tiny boats with Eileen, "Mordecai BETTER buy me that cereal after this"

"Oh come on Rigby it isn't that bad" Eileen smiled, "In a way it's kind of...cute...don't you think?"

"No."

"Uh...ok...um...well do you want to start peddling now?"

"No."

"Well I don't think I could peddle this all by myself so...are we just going to sit here?"

"Yes."

"Come on you losers, I bet you couldn't beat our lame duck boat to the other end of the paddling area!" Mordecai yelled out as he and Maraget zoomed past.

"Whoo hoo! Later you slow pokes!" She laughed.

"Come on let's race them! In these boats it'll feel like we're a part of the annual migration of the humpback whale!" Eileen said enthusiastically.

Rigby just stared at her.

"Yeah! Let's go! Eh...ehhhh! ehhh!" Eileen started struggling and the paddle boat began moving at snail's pace.

* * *

"Whoa I think we lost them" Mordecai said turning around to see all the stalls out of sight, in fact he didn't recognise any of these settings anymore, "uh...where does the paddling area stop?"

"I...don't know" Margaret said confused, "Do you know what part of town this is?"

"Not a clue" Mordecai said stopping paddling and just letting the river carry them through the jungle like setting, "whoa it looks like we're in another country"

"I know...maybe we should turn around" Margaret said starting to sound concerned.

"Yeah" Mordecai said putting his foot on the peddle which snapped off, "...o-oh"

"Gasp! Oh no! What are we going to do now?" Margaret said worried.

"Uh, uh! It's ok, we'll be fine. We haven't reached the end of the paddling area yet so we'll just let the current take us. Someone will be there it'll be fine" he assured her.

"Sigh...you're right. You always know what to say Mordecai"

"Uh, ha...yeah I uh, guess I'm just...good like that" he said nervously.

"Oh you are, are you?" she giggled.

"Uh, well, um, I just meant that...hey I wonder what Rigby and Eileen are doing now?" he said quickly changing the subject. Margaret rolled her eyes and smiled.

"You NEVER know what to say Mordecai, you always stutter all the time"

"No I don't! It's just when I'm around yo- uh..."

"...when you're around me?"

"Um...well...yeah I just." He stopped she just sat smiling back. Soon the two started leaning in towards each other.

"Wait!" Margaret said suddenly, "do you hear rushing water?"

"Huh?" Mordecai said peering behind her noticing the end of a large waterfall, "what? Since when did this river end in a waterfall?"

"Since NOW! Quick! Try and paddle back!" she screamed and the two started frantically splashing water around but it was no use. In no time they both went tumbling over the edge of the falls.

* * *

"Gah, what's taking those two so long" Rigby grumbled. They, well, more so he, had decided to end their boat ride early and wait for Mordecai and Margaret to return.

"Aw, they're probably caught up in the romance of today" Eileen cooed.

"Yeah right. Mordecai can't even say his own name right in front of her. I wouldn't be surprised if he fell out of the boat or something"

"Well, some people say strange things happen on Valentine's Day. Some people get overwhelmed in the moment of it all and fall in love"

"Pft, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Only someone as stupid as Mordecai could have that kind of thing happen to him" Rigby replied and to his surprise Eileen started laughing.

"Yeah. So, do you want to keep looking around while we're waiting?"

"Not really but I have nothing better to do"

"Cool, let's go then!"

* * *

"Whaaaaaaa!" The two birds cried as they fell down the waterfall, but instead of hitting a wall of water then fell in through a swirling pink vortex to another dimension.

"Dah! Where are we?" Mordecai sat up looking around confused, although these occurrences where quite common for him, Margaret on the other hand looked very surprised and a little worried.

"What happened?" She lasked. The whole place looked just like the town stalls except everything was pink, "Um excuse me- AH!" she said surprised as a pink man walked straight through her like she was a ghost.

"Hey! Hey there's Rigby and Eileen! Hey guys!" Mordecai yelled but the two seemed to be on mute even though they were talking and they too walked straight through him, "gasp!"

"Don't bother, nothing pink can hear you" a normal coloured man said.

"What? What's going on? Who are you?" Mordecai asked.

"We're all couples who have taken the love duck ride" The man's girlfriend said. Mordecai looked around and noticed that there were indeed about a dozen couples here.

"Oh come on! I have to get back to my job! I demand to see whoever's keeping us her- huh? Mordecai!"

"...Benson?" Mordecai raised an eyebrow, "what are you doing here?"

"Uh...I was just, you know, checking out the stalls..."

"Oh Benson! These are your friends from my party right?" Audrey walked up behind him.

"Uh...yeah"

"Pft-..." Mordecai tried to stop himself laughing, "Wait, let me get this straight. You told me and Rigby to clean the new fountain all day so you could go on a date with Audrey? What happened to 'I don't slack off unlike you!'" he said mimicking his voice.

"I'm on a lunch. Break" Benson grumbled.

"Pretty long lunch break. Weren't you supposed to be back at work five minutes ago?" he smirked.

"Weren't YOU supposed to be cleaning the FOUNTAIN?"

"Guys! Please! I don't know what's going on either but we have to find a way out of here!" Margaret interrupted.

All of a sudden there was a pink thunderclap and something appeared out of the sky.

"Whoa..." everyone gasped as five pink ducks appeared which looked just like their boats.

"I suppose you're wondering why you're all here." A duck wearing a crown spoke.

"Um, yeah?"

"Well we're not going to tell you"

"Aw, come on!"

"Fine! Gosh! Everyone says there's 'something in the air' on Valentine's Day" he grinned.

"Yeah, it's love man, what else?"

"SILENCE! It is not mere 'love'...it is the SOULS of lovers bringing about love and uniting couples AND feeding us, giving us power, LETTING US GROW! MWA HA HA HA!"

"Um...so...I'm confused. You say on Valentine's Day there's lovers...souls floating around making people fall in love and-"

"Giving us STRENGTH to one day take over the world! MWA HA HA! Quack"

"I'm...still confused" Mordecai said, "How does making people fall in love help you take over the world and...What does this have to do with us?"

"SILENCE! When we have enough power we will be able to make everyone fall so deeply in love with us they will obey our every command! And, you are the souls of lovers we are using!"

"Whoa! Well uh, we're not...in love...or anything...so...you can let us go" Mordecai said awkwardly next to Margaret.

"Yes you are, well more so you are. IT STILL WORKS!" The king duck yelled.

"Wow...this is embarrassing" he said noticing now that everyone including Margaret was staring at him.

* * *

"Gee thanks for buying me candy floss Rigby" Eileen grinned as the two continued to walk though the stalls.

"I didn't. It was two for the price of one and you assumed the other one was yours" He muttered under his breath, "Ugh. Stupid Mordecai bailing on me"

"What's wrong?" Eileen said concerned.

"Nothing. It's just that I really wanted to get this guitar dude action figure but Mordecai won't let me buy any more cereal!" he huffed.

"Oh really? I really wanted one of those action figures too but I never get one in my packet and I haven't finished my last box"

"You actually eat the cereal?" Rigby said surprised.

"Hey I have an idea! Why don't we go to the shops and buy a ton of cereal boxes just to find the toy!"

"Action figure" He corrected, "and not like I've already tried that or anything but sure! Wait...who's paying?"

"Uh...I guess I could"

"Then what are we waiting for!"

* * *

"Ugh! There must be a way out of here!" Mordecai said.

"Nope, there isn't, QUACK!"

"Argh! All I wanted to do was spend the day with Margaret! Can't I ever do something like this without something weird HAPPENING TO ME?" Mordecai yelled and kicked the ground and for an instant everything flashed back into normal colour.

"What?" Margaret said, "...Mordecai, do that again?"

"What? This?" He said stomping on the ground.

"No, get angry!"

"Um...no, I don't have a reason to"

"Mordecai I told you to get angry NOW!" She yelled and everything flashed back to normal again.

"Oh gee Margaret I'm sorry-"

"No, don't be, get angry!"

"Gasp! Quack! Not Anger! It's the opposite to love!" The ducks cried.

"Oh yeah! I HATE THIS PLACE! AND I HATE THE FACT I ALWAYS STUFF UP IN FRONT OF MARGARET AND I HATE THE WAY RIGBY'S BEEN BUGGING ME ABOUT CEREAL ALL DAY!" He yelled and the pink started fading.

"I hate this duck ride!" One girl yelled.

"I hate all ducks!" Another yelled.

"ahem...let me handle this" Benson said, "ARGH! I HATE THE WAY MORDECAI AND RIGBY ALWAYS SLACK OFF ON THE MOST SIMPLE OF TASKS AND LEAVE ME WITH THE BLAME AND-"

"Noooo! The hate...too much! Too muuuuuuch!" The ducks cried and suddenly exploded into roast chickens as everyone got poofed back into the normal world.

"Whoa...We're back! Way to go Mordecai!" Margaret cheered.

"What?" Benson snapped, "Oh, never mind...I have to get back to work"

"Aw, it was fun today Benson, I hope we can do it again some time...well maybe not the duck kidnapping part" Audrey smiled and kissed him on the cheek before walking off.

"Yeah...sure"

"pft heh heh heh" Mordecai snickered.

"One word out of you and you're FIRED!" Benson snapped then began hurriedly walking back to the park.

"Heh heh, well I guess I had fun too" Margaret smiled.

"You're kidding...right?"

"No, I really like spending time with you"

"Really? Cause I think you're...well, I didn't want to tell you when Rigby and Eileen where around but-"

"Gasp! Rigby and Eileen! We better go find them!"

"...yeah" Mordecai said slightly annoyed.

* * *

"Whoa? What was that pink explosion near the duck ride?" Eileen said sitting next the Rigby on a grassy patch behind the stalls, up to their waists in cereal as they continued to tear through the boxes.

"Rigby? What are you doing here! You're supposed to be cleaning the fountain with Mordecai and I find you doing..." Benson stopped seeing him sitting in a mound of cereal with Eileen, "actually I don't even know what you're doing and I don't care. Just get Mordecai and come back to the park" he said walking off again.

"Jeesh what's his problem?" Rigby shrugged.

"I told you Valentine's Day does strange thing to some people" Eileen giggled.

"Nah Benson's always like that. I'm just surprised he didn't drag me back with him...I wonder where Mordecai and Margaret went? Wouldn't be surprised if they where kiiiiiiissing" Rigby said in a childish manner.

"Oh I would be considering Mordecai" Eileen said and the two began laughing.

"Oh look there's one more cereal box left!" Rigby pointed. They both grabbed it and started digging around furiously.

"Oh my gosh I think I got something!"

"Me too! Look it's-" Eileen stopped as both their hands came out the same time holding the action figure.

"Whoa..." Rigby stared at it amazed along with Eileen, but then he glanced up at her. Eileen took notice and blushed slightly. Something weird seemed to be happening. Rigby thought she looked nice even with her glasses on today, and her side pigtail looked...really cute, 'oh no!' he thought, 'ohhh- NO! Eileen...becoming attractive! Must...fight...Valentine's day...love...AH! Moment...too..strong! Can't stop-...noooooo!"

* * *

"Rigby! Eileen! Gosh where are those two?" Mordecai said walking behind a stall with Margaret.

"I don't know probably looking for- what the-! Eileen?"

"RIGBY?" Mordecai said shocked as they walked in on the two kissing in a pile of cereal.

"DAH! THIS ISN'T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!" Rigby suddenly sprung back, "I was overwhelmed by the moment! Strange stuff happens on Valentine's day! Eileen became attractive and- ahh!"

"Awwww! That's cute!" Margaret said while Mordecai bit his lip trying not to laugh.

"I...uh...SHE DID IT!" Rigby pointed the finger accusingly.

"Ooooooooooooooooooooooh!" Mordecai cheered.

"Um...I think we better get back to uh...helping at the...coffee...shop" Eileen said awkwardly.

"Oh yeah what's the time? I said we'd be back at- GASP! IT'S 3 ALREADY?!" Margaret said suddenly, "Sorry guys we have to go like now! Bye Mordecai!"

"See ya Margaret"

"Bye Rigby!" Eileen waved.

Rigby just stood there with a look of pure shock on his face.

When they had left Mordecai looked at Rigby with a massive grin, "...soooooooooo..."

"STOP TALKING!" Rigby screamed.


End file.
